How to build confidence when speaking on stage, according to a professional public speaker

Here’s the thing. Most of us can all speak. We talk all day, everyday to our loved ones and colleagues.

So, if you don’t (yet) enjoy speaking from a stage, it’s not a matter of not being a ‘good speaker’, you just need a few specific skills you most likely haven’t been taught yet.

I have been speaking in front of large crowds for 20 years and right before I go out on stage, I still feel like my heart will beat right out of my chest. I get cotton mouth and sweaty palms. But because fear and excitement are actually almost physiologically identical, I choose to say I’m excited, not that I’m scared. This is a choice you can make too.

As Canadian Olympic basketball coach Jack Donohue put it: “It’s not a case of getting rid of the butterflies, it’s a question of getting them to fly in formation”.

With that, here are some tips for building confidence when speaking on stage.

Write like you speak

For some reason, when we are asked to speak from a stage, the first thing we do is sit down and write out a ‘speech’. Here’s why that’s not a great idea.

We don’t speak how we write. When we put pen to paper instead of voice to paper, we can end up simply reading out a long chunk of text that actually doesn’t sound at all like how we talk.

The first thing I get my clients to do after drafting what they would like to say, is ‘conversationalise’ it. Meaning, how would you actually say it if you were in conversation with someone at a barbecue? This helps us to sound more authentic and natural.

Tip: Conversationalise your words.

Share stories, not statistics

We are wired for stories, not data and statistics.

I encourage my clients to keep a story tracker – a place to record stories – along with what lesson they teach and themes they relate to. You could share personal stories, anecdotes from others or stories from well-known brands or businesses.

By opening with a story, you allow your audience to get to know you on a personal level, making it easier for them to trust you.

Tip: You don’t have to share big, harrowing or heartbreaking stories to get your point across. Stick to everyday anecdotes that demonstrate the key lessons you’ve learned – they’re just as powerful.

Practice with purpose

If you plan to give a talk on a stage in front of a crowd, practice as if you are on that stage. That means reading from your notes in the comfort of your lounge chair is out, and standing up with a hairbrush in hand is in.

Remember, every time you move your hairbrush away from your mouth the audience has lost you.

Avoid death by PowerPoint

Slides and visual aids work a treat in reinforcing a key moment for your audience, but there is a caveat to this. I generally stick to the rule of no more than 10 words on a slide and prefer high-quality images, GIFs and short videos.

Your visual aids are there to support your presentation, not replace it. Your audience shouldn’t be able to get every word from your delivery by reading your slides. Less is more.

Visualise

Your brain is designed to keep you safe, not help you succeed.

If you haven’t got much (or any) experience with speaking on a stage, your brain doesn’t have any files to pull from to help it relax about the whole situation, so it’s bound to get loud and negative.

To help your brain calm down, you’re going to visualise. See yourself on stage, looking out at the audience. See them interested, engaged, smiling and clapping. See yourself moving about on stage with ease, your words flowing freely. Specifically visualise receiving compliments and positive feedback afterwards.

Really take yourself to that moment. Visualisations are only as powerful as your ability to feel them.

Physically prepare for it

Although your main instrument as a speaker is your voice, speaking is a whole body activity, so it needs to be warmed up as well.

I highly recommend a playlist with your favourite tunes you can bust a move to (feel free to do this in the privacy of a bathroom) and humming along to your favourite song in it’s entirety.

Slow neck stretches, head rolls and shoulder rolls forwards and backwards will help to really free up that area.

Tip: Don’t forget to breathe. Your pace naturally quickens with the adrenaline that can accompany speaking to a crowd so aim for five long, slow breaths (inhale for four, exhale for six) to help activate your parasympathetic nervous system before you go out on stage.